21.8.08

let the healing begin. june 18th.

Is it possible for everyday of my life to be ordained. Is it probable to believe that there is a concrete plan for my existence. Is it?
The more focused I become on believing in something bigger, I am pulled toward believing in a more strict predestination. a predestination I created myself, yet is completely out of my control. Today, I felt angst being lifted from my thorax. Maybe it is just the distraction and outpouring of my heart on these girls, but I do not care at this point. It is a breath of fresh air I've been struggling to take. while trying not to drown. The last few months have been the closest to hell I have experienced. But they are forgettable. They have to be forgotten-or at least less vivid. I want to learn but I do not want to go back. I am so small compared to it all.
I am so small.
I like this neverland.

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